Love in the Digital Age

Remember the time when there were no phones? Well, neither do I. We’re GenX and we’re all about the gadgets. We’re all about the fast lane and just too cool for school. We’ve traded newspapers for newsfeeds, shopping experiences have become virtual affairs, music no longer needs to have lyrics and even love is just a click (or swipe) away.

As I sit to write this piece, I wonder...  is this progress or regress? Though there’s no denying that the advancement of technology has been of extraordinary aid to mankind, there’s also no denying that some things are best left unchanged. Do you really think you could find true, bonafide love on a dating app? Mabye. There are possibilities. But I believe that the digital world could also very well be a farce. According to me, tampering with the whole authenticity and sincerity of romance is just not okay. While the contemporary trend of online dating might be a boon to some lonesome or bored individuals out there, there are also some of us who believe that this approach has made true love not easier but harder to find.

Here are some reasons to justify why old souls like myself find it difficult to accept this so called life hack.

It’s superficial. Looks triumph over personality.  

There’s nothing wrong with longing for a good looking partner but when that is the very first step to selecting a potential companion, that itself speaks volumes. While assessing someone merely on their display picture could at times be fun, how helpful is it for someone who doesn't care how you look but is interested in how you are? I speak for the lot of us who aren't just looking for a quick run, the bunch that are actually looking to find someone worth investing time in. It’s all banking on (slim) chance (s) these days... Is the guy with the unbuttoned shirt and dark hair THE ONE? Who knows… I’ll just have to wait it out until I meet him and find out or he says something creepy enough for me to unmatch his irresistible picture.

Expectations vs Reality.

When you talk to someone online, you can be anyone you want and you can lie as much as you want. How do I even know if a person is actually single? What ever happened to the ‘process’ ? You meet someone, sparks fly, your fondness grows and then you take a call on whether or not you’d like to turn this friendship into something more. With this whole virtual dating experience, it’s easy for a person to build up an image of the other in their heads. Hence, when the face-to-face (if at all) finally happens, the probability of you being disappointed is quite high. Your expectations don’t meet reality and you’re back to square one.

Too many options.

When do you stop? There’s always more. No one will ever be enough because there will always be someone better, nicer and hotter to choose from. When you’re searching for perfection, you’ll always be disappointed. We’re beginning to lose the fear of losing a loved one because we feel we’ll find someone else. There’s always more.

Short term thrills.

Nothing compares to a relationship built on a strong foundation of friendship. Online dating can sometimes only last till the chase. After the ‘honeymoon’ period is over, you lose interest and realise that there’s nothing concrete enough to hold on to. So save yourself the time and energy and meet people in person to start with. Build something that will last.

Safety first.

Meeting a complete stranger at his house or in his car isn't the most intelligent thing to do. Though most people will argue that they would always meet a person for the first time at a public place, it’s still risky business. How much you reveal and how you would handle a potential weirdo are always things to be cautious about.

Have you ever been a part of the online dating game? Good or bad, let us know in the comments below, how it worked out for you...