Caught your partner’s lies: Learn how to handle the situation POSITIVELY

We fall in love and love just seems to happen. Yet it takes a lot of time and effort to build trust. It is even more difficult to build and sustain the trust with a romantic partner whom you have just caught red handed with a lie. Lies sets us off into worst of spiralling, negativity and creates riffs that take forever to mend. The first thoughts that we encounter when we catch our partner’s lies are ‘ifs’ and ‘buts’. Trust becomes as fragile as a dream and our world comes to a halt. You may cry or keep mum, but the struggle to accept this fact is becomes truly difficult as time goes by. So how should you deal with such a situation and come out stronger from it? Here are a few positive actions to take if you ever catch your partner lying.

1. Approach your partner gently

Once you are ready to confront the person, never approach them with an accusatory tone. Instead of questioning why your partner lied to you, tell them how the lie had affected you and the relationship. This will encourage your partner to participate in a constructive conversation. A blame game will only make your partner defensive.

2. Do not beat around the bush

The reason why you confronted your partner is to know the truth, so there’s no point beating around the bush. Ask them about whatever is troubling your mind and be prepared to hear the truth.

3. Be patient while listening to your partner

Give the other person a chance to explain their side of the story. Listen patiently and try to understand the reason why they felt compelled to lie. Try to find the reason behind the lie so that it can be avoided in the future.

4. Do not trivialise their lies

When a person lies, it’s usually because they are afraid of the conversation that would follow had they simply spoken the truth. Do not dismiss any lie as trivial and try to understand where your relationship is lacking and how your partner seems to view it.

5. Trust your guts before you decide to forgive (or not)

After the confrontation and explanation, consider carefully if you are ready to forgive and forget. Do not take any drastic steps without thinking clearly.