JOIN OUR WHATSAPP CHANNEL
Mother's Day Special: Mahhi Vij on media attention for Tara, raising her amidst Covid & having a baby 'late'
On account of Mother's Day, Mahhi Vij in an exclusive tete-a-tete with Pinkvilla, spoke about her plans for the special day and her challenges as a mother especially during pandemic.
It won't be wrong if we term Actress Mahhi Vij as a superwoman. As much as she is a thorough professional at work, she is equally a dutiful daughter, a responsible wife, a strong woman and a hands-on mother to her little girl Tara and foster babies Khushi and Rajveer. On account of Mother's Day, Mahhi in an exclusive tete a tete with Pinkvilla.com, spoke about her plans for the special day, her challenges as a mother especially during pandemic and how her little Tara is God's biggest blessing for her.
What are your plans for Mother's Day?
No plans for mother's day at all. There are children who are dying out there and there are mother's who are dying. I can't even imagine celebrating any festival or even for that matter Tara's second birthday. If at all things get better by then, I may give it a thought but as of now, I don't plan to celebrate any occasion especially when the outer world scenario is so grim.
I am very emotional anyway and the entire day Tara diverts my mind but at night when I go through the news, I become depressed. It is so emotionally heavy to soak in all of this that is happening out there. We all are a part of the universe so we should be together in this emotionally too. I think we should all just should not celebrate Mother's Day this year because imagine how those kids who have lost their parents would feel, what they would go through. It's important to be a little compassionate.
As a mother, what is the most difficult thing for you owing to the current situation?
To take care of my baby's physical and mental health is the most challenging thing for me in COVID times. As a mother, I had prayed for a baby like Tara and had her after 10 years of marriage. So I am all more anxious and protective over her well-being.
Tara is eighteen months old and for her age, she needs to play out amidst other kids, nature etc but unfortunately it's not possible for children as of now to do that. But we can't even do away without giving them what their age demands. So Jay and I tend to become a child with her and play. But there are certain limitations to us too. How much ever we try to be a child, there is a difference between a real one and us trying to act like one. Kids have their own language after all. So managing all of this is very difficult and taxing.
Khushi and Rajveer are in their hometown. How much do you miss them especially during such times and with Mother's Day around?
I wasn't willing to let the babies go and travel during Corona. But I am happy that Khushi and Rajveer are currently in a safe place in their hometown because the cases there are comparatively very low. Also their grandparents really wanted the kids to stay with them since a very long time. So I am happy that both the kids are getting to spend some good quality time with their grandparents. Also, the grandparents, I think, did not want them to stay in a city leaving the village. So whatever decision they all take, I will respect it. I can't interfere much because we haven't legally adopted the children so it's their family's decision whether to stay back or return to Mumbai. But whatever their decision will be, Jay and I will always be there for them. We talk to them everyday and Khushi and Rajveer are very happy there. Both the babies have literally grown up in my lap so our bond will remain immortal.
What was Tara's first word?! How is Tara bonding with you as she grows up?
Tara's first word was Mumma. And now it's no longer Mumma. She directly refers to me as Mahhi and she is totally a mommy's girl. During daytime she needs me but at night she needs her father. She can't sleep without hugging Jay. She's balanced it smartly that way. Also I genuinely believe that my baby is God's child. She is so sensitive and caring at just eighteen months. Whenever I am low or crying, she realises that and comes to me. She hugs and kisses me and puts in all her efforts to comfort me.
Any special quality of Tara that you have noticed that speaks about her developing personality?
Tara is extremely giving. She believes that all that she has, even the littlest of it, should be shared amongst all. She is very compassionate towards everything in the surrounding. She randomly picks up money from Jay's wallet and gives it to the delivery boy. As much as she is loving towards humans, she is equally loving towards animals, birds, plants. She will want to feed everybody and wants to make sure that everybody is well-fed. Also a very good quality that I have seen in her at this age is that she is extremely humble towards people who are not so privileged. Recently we had gone for a wedding, where she saw a gardener sitting alone away from us. So this little girl went upto to her and started to strike a conversation with the gardener. Tara chose not to play with her friends and rather be with the gardener because the gardener was alone. Jay noticed this quality and we realised that Tara has a beautiful heart, and that quality is God Gifted. I feel so blessed.
How much are you comfortable with Tara getting a lot of media and paparazzi attention, at such a young age?
The media likes capturing popular faces and I do not shy away from the fact that Tara too is a little popular for her age. Also recently when she was crying at the airport when I had to leave for an event without her, the camera persons were in fact trying to console her and that was just so sweet. So in fact I love to see Tara being showered with so much love from the media.
Also people who have a problem with the paparazzi, I guess they can just inform their respective PRs that they do not want paparazzi around them at xyz events or at the airport. The paparazzi are informed by the PRs regarding their respective celebrity client's flight details or event timings and location. The camera persons are called to click the celebrity which is why they come. The paps don't suddenly dream about the arrival and departure timings of celebrities and magically appear at the airport, right! So in case anybody has a problem with the paps clicking them, they can convey their discomfort to their PRs and the paps won't be there then. It's simple.
You had Tara after 35. What do you think of having a child after an age that is considered 'late' by society?
I don't believe in the norms set by society. I have my family for support and my own mind to think. It's absolutely okay for women to have babies whenever they want. It is the couple's choice to plan a family when they feel the time is right and not when the society feels. I had my biological baby when I felt the time was right. Yes, in a way I do believe that having a child at an early age is good because you then get good time to spend with them. I, at times, think that when Tara will be in her late teenage, I will be around 55+ years. The thought of what incase something happens to me and Tara is left alone, haunts me. So only for that reason I feel that having babies early is good.
Otherwise in today's world, girls are making sure that they prioritise their individual finance and secure their future. Nobody plans a baby late out of joy. There are certain responsibilities that everybody has and fulfilling them first is important for many. I wanted to make myself so financially set that I could take care of my parents all by myself which I did and got them to Mumbai from Delhi. I wanted to settle them first and then plan for my offspring. It would have been wrong on my part as a daughter to leave them alone and not fulfill my responsibilities towards them and simply plan a baby. If I can't be a dutiful daughter to my parents, how will I be a dutiful mother to my child? I planned my finances in that way where I could take care of my parents, myself and my entire pregnancy tenure of nine months and then Jay and I decided to go ahead with expanding our family.
