A guide on how to tackle your teenager’s first crush

When you think of your pre-teen child falling in love, it can bring out the worst in you. After all, you’re probably not ready to let your baby girl or little son grow up quite so soon. Nevertheless, if you look back at your own childhood, you shall realise that adolescence is when you do have your first crush. So, you may have to face the fact that a classmate of your child likes them or perhaps it is your own kid who has a crush. If you’re struggling with accepting this notion, here are a few tips to help you handle your kid’s first crush.

It is quite common for teens to keep texting their crush for hours or even perhaps missing school to go meet each other. While this is in cases of reciprocal attraction, you must keep an eye on the situation to ensure that your child’s studies aren’t compromised because of their feelings and unexpected behavior. Enforce a curfew time and strict hours for phone usage to ensure the communication is not excessive. Striking a healthy balance is important.

A crush can be a private feeling. So, if you spot your kid blushing or stuttering when they speak to one of their friends, you may realise it’s a crush. But do not out your kid amid their friends or parents of their friends. This may end badly for your kid as the others may ridicule your child for their feelings or even tell the object of their affection. This could be catastrophic if your little one is shy and hoping to keep things a secret at the time.

Your first crush teaches you a lot of things. It can be a hard lesson if your feelings are not reciprocated, for then you may have to learn to grieve and get over unrequited love. As a parent, make sure you explain to your kid that this is not the end and that there is more to life.

Whether your child is aged 10, 12 or 14 when they have their first crush, you may be tempted to rebuke them and demand that they focus on their education. However, having an open dialogue will ensure that they open up to you rather than conceal their feelings from you.

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